Also By UsSlow RobotI Waste So Much TimeI Waste So Much MoneyDear Blank Please BlankAttack of the Cute
Realized
The Tooth Fairy encourages us to sell our bodies.
Realized
The Pringles guy looks just like a younger Mr. Monopoly.
Realized
Saying "I just hit that" while pointing to a woman makes you sound like a pimp no matter how people interpret it.
Realized
It's a little unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice."
Fact
Your cat will never be as cute as the cats you see online.
Fact
Parents may have had to do their homework without Wikipedia, but they also didn't have Facebook.
Definition
Polar Bear (noun) - A form of public transportation in Canada.
Realized
Sending someone a friend request on Facebook is a declaration that you are comfortable with stalking them online.
Fact
There are only two types of people, those who can extrapolate from incomplete data and...
Definition
It's not you, it's me (phrase) - It's my fault that I don't find you interesting or attractive anymore.
Definition
Irony (noun) - telling Lord Voldemort he's being nosy.
Signs that things aren't going so well
The only thing that runs in your family is obesity.
Fact
There's always that one weird kid in your class and if you can't tell who it is, I have some bad news for you.
Signs that things aren't going so well
Your mother is wearing your jeans. She looks better in them than you.
Signs that things aren't going so well
Your mom seems to confuse the meaning of "I'm bored" with "I want to do chores."
Definition
Oh, it was nothing (phrase) - It took me 40 hours, and if you say anything bad I will honestly punch your face off.
Definition
Awkward (adjective) - When you ask the black kid in your class for the skin colored crayon.
Fact
The better you feel about a test, the lower your actual grade.
Definition
FatBooth (proper noun) - An application designed to show what you will look like in 10 years.