Fact
Living increases your risk of dying.
Realized
Most girls say that they "aren't like most girls."
Definition
Jeggings (noun) - A loophole in the dress code.
Definition
Incomplete (adjective) - A ten letter word that means.
Fact
Most "fun sized" candies are lying about the amount of fun the candy actually is.
Tips for success
Gargle bleach to kill the germs your mouthwash can't.
To do list
Live forever or die trying.
Definition
Period (noun) - Monthly congratulations for having safe sex.
Signs that things aren't going so well
Your best pick up line is "Get in the van!"
Realized
Dogs look just as funny before they sneeze as humans do.
Definition
Fox guarding the henhouse (phrase) - A pregnant woman left alone with ice cream in the freezer.
Signs that things aren't going so well
You have two legs... You're a dog.
Tips for success
If you are talentless and ugly, you will have success in the music industry.
Tips for success
Stab everyone you know with a wooden stake to make sure they aren't vampires.
Signs that things aren't going so well
You think your identical twin is ugly.
To do list
Change name to Frank. Start every sentence with "I'm going to be Frank..."
Tips for success
Stay away from muggers by hiding in dark alleyways.
Definition
Awkward (adjective) - When you look at your neighbors window and see them staring back at you.
Definition
Divorce (noun) - The future tense of marriage.
Signs that things aren't going so well
Your first move on your crush is starting a Words With Friends game with them.
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