Definition
Family planning (verb) - The art of spacing your children the proper number of years apart to keep you on the edge of financial ruin.
Definition
Elections (noun) - The act of choosing which liar is the most convincing.
Definition
Boobs (noun) - Totally awesome, unless they're on a guy.
Definition
Genetics (noun) - A way to make all of your flaws your parents' fault.
Definition
Growing up (verb) - That moment when you have to switch to a more serious e-mail address.
Definition
Group project (noun) - Time to relax while you watch some nerd who cares do all the work.
Definition
Solitaire (noun) - A game played by cat ladies before they have cats.
Definition
The Game (noun) - Something you just lost.
Definition
Yeah, sounds great! (phrase) - I totally didn't listen to anything you just said so I'm just going to agree with it.
Definition
Public swimming pool (noun) - People soup.
Definition
Hedgehog (noun) - A small creature which selfishly inhabits a hedge.
Definition
Secret (noun) - Something you tell everybody to tell nobody.
Definition
Dry clean only (phrase) - I will never wash this, ever.
Definition
Ironic (adjective) - Being passed by an impatient police officer while driving the speed limit.
Definition
Yahoo (proper noun) - The ugly cousin-in-law of Google that you use to hook up with in high school, but are now too ashamed to admit that you even know her.
Definition
Secret admirer (noun) - A stalker with stationery.
Definition
You had to be there (phrase) - What people add to the end of stories they thought were funny when no one laughs.
Definition
Organic (adjective) - A grocery term which means twice as expensive.
Definition
Hollister shorts (noun) - Denim underwear.
Definition
Creeping (noun) Having a highly evolved sense of observation.
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