Also By UsSlow RobotI Waste So Much TimeI Waste So Much MoneyDear Blank Please BlankAttack of the Cute
Fact
You have never used an entire stick of chapstick.
Fact
There’s no panic like trying to press "End Call" when you make an accidental call.
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Taylor Swift doesn't know how Romeo and Juliet ended.
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You will never run out of shampoo and conditioner at the same time.
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"Googling yourself" is never going to sound like anything but a euphemism.
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Your report card will always come out as soon as you want to ask your parents for something.
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Once your headphones are in, everyone starts talking to you.
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Disney movies are more fun to watch when you're 16 than when you're 6.
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Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for the night. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.
Fact
There are much more productive things that you could be doing right now.
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Being an ugly woman is like being a man. You're going to have to work.
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The "i" before "e' rule is weird.
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You can call half of the world's population less than average.
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It is as bad as you think, and they are out to get you.
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It is illegal to name a pig Napoleon in France.
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When you have a fat friend, there are no such thing as see-saws, only catapults.
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If Annie doesn't respond within the first 3 times, she's probably not okay.
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You will always lose your phone when it's on silent.
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Cursive was invented for the sole purpose of writing your name in the snow with urine.
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The morning you need to be at work early is the morning your alarm clock will not go off.