Also By UsSlow RobotI Waste So Much TimeI Waste So Much MoneyDear Blank Please BlankAttack of the Cute
Fact
No matter how hot the outside of the Hot Pocket is, the middle will still be frozen.
Fact
You are what you eat. For example, if you eat a cannibal, then you are a cannibal.
Fact
You are living proof that your parents had sex.
Fact
Orangutans are the gingers of the monkey world.
Fact
The amount of food you have in your mouth will always be proportionate to the level of hotness of the girl or guy that is walking by.
Fact
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
Fact
Friends are like condoms, they protect you when things get hard.
Fact
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
Fact
The moment you think of a really good invention, someone else already thought of it 5 years ago.
Fact
5 out of 4 people struggle with fractions.
Fact
Everything is 10 times more annoying if you hate the person doing it.
Fact
When a dementor sucks out your soul, your skin gets freckles and your hair turns red.
Fact
The most awkward person will always arrive at your party first.
Fact
If you’re one in a million, there are six thousand people exactly like you.
Fact
The intensity of your need to pee will always be inversely proportionate to how easy it is to get your belt off.
Fact
If you yell "GO! GO GO!" loudly enough at the people playing sports on the TV screen, they can hear you.
Fact
You will always fail when trying to show someone something you just did perfectly.
Fact
Your spoon will always tip over your pudding cup when you finish it.
Fact
Alcohol doesn't solve any problems, but then again, neither does milk.
Fact
If a couple in love are called Love Birds, then a couple who've fought should be called Angry Birds.