Fact
If you're afraid of spiders, you'll see 99% more spiders than people who aren't.
Fact
Whenever you do something right no one remembers. Whenever you do something wrong no one forgets.
Fact
It's not possible to make cookies without eating some cookie dough.
Fact
Nice guys are ugly, cute guys are mean and nice and cute guys are gay.
Fact
Exclamation points in textbooks always sound incredibly forced.
Fact
That hilarious joke you just read will be the most boring thing in the world once you tell it to your friends.
Fact
All generalizations are bad.
Fact
You can never underestimate the stupidity of the general public.
Fact
No matter where you sit at a sporting event, the screamer will always be sitting behind you.
Fact
The difference between employment and unemployment is pants with elastic waistbands.
Fact
Phone sex is the number one cause of hearing-aids.
Fact
When there is a will, there are 500 relatives.
Fact
A duck's opinion of you is largely influenced on whether or not you have bread.
Fact
When the pilot says it's going to take a bit longer to take off, they actually left their plane keys at home on the counter.
Fact
Imagine a person of perfectly average intelligence. 50% of the world is dumber than him.
Fact
No matter what time you said you preferred, the only math class available in college will always be at 8 AM.
Fact
The Italian word for "evil" is "male."
Fact
Bears eat beets. Bears. Beets. Battlestar Galactica.
Fact
Women are like puzzles, neither could vote prior to 1920. Puzzles still can't.
Fact
Friends are like snowflakes. When you pee on them, they disappear.
EVERYTHING WITHIN A MILLION PIXEL RADIUS OF HERE, COPYRIGHT © GROUCHYRABBIT.COM - CONTACT US - FEEDBACK - TERMS AND PRIVACY