Fact
No matter how much food is in your house, there is nothing good to eat.
Definition
Awkward (adjective) - When the guy in the white windowless van driving you home drives past your house.
Definition
Schizophrenia (noun) - Two friends for the price of one.
Definition
Imagination (noun) - The ability to turn anything into a rocketship; usually lost at puberty.
Definition
Eski-ho (noun) - A girl who wears UGGS with a short skirt or shorts.
Fact
You will always walk into your school's bathroom hoping to be the only person there.
Tips for success
When your parents tell you to improve your grades, fail all your classes to give them a parenting challenge.
Fact
Men like what they see. Women like what they hear. That's why men lie and women wear makeup.
Signs that things aren't going so well
Even cleverbot is weirded out by your attempts at flirting.
Tips for success
If you meet someone who you think is ugly or fat, tell them! Remember, honesty is always the best policy...
Tips for success
Hit every limousine that you can with your vehicle. It will increase your chances of meeting someone famous.
Realized
America's punishment for leaving England is losing their accents.
Realized
That awkward moment you realize everyone is listening to your conversation.
Definition
Awkward (adjective) - When you are looking at yourself in the window of a parked car and there is a person inside staring back at you.
Definition
Mole (noun) - A 3D freckle.
To do list
Dress up as Waldo on picture day. Turn your yearbook into your own personal Where's Waldo book.
To do list
Go trick-or-treating as a Jehovah's Witness.
Definition
Finals (noun) - The time of the year when everyone who called you a nerd suddenly wants to be your best friend.
Definition
Boomerang (noun) - A frisbee for lonely people.
Tips for success
In order to let others know how much you value water conservation, don't flush the toilet in public restrooms.
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