Tips for success
To teach your nosy neighbors a lesson, name your WIFI network, "send help, held hostage."
Definition
Lunatic (noun) - Anyone who likes the moon.
Realized
Most middle class people are more suited to run the country than the government.
Definition
Animal instinct (noun) - That little voice in your head that makes you check behind the shower curtain.
Definition
Awkward (adjective) - Trying to get something out of your left pocket with your right hand.
To do list
Go trick-or-treating on April fools day.
Definition
Summer (noun) - The season where you never know what day it is.
Signs that things aren't going so well
The man that you are sword fighting isn't left handed either.
Realized
Edward Cullen is the only guy who would like his girlfriend more when she is on her period.
Definition
Google Translate (proper noun) - The only reason you passed Spanish.
Signs that things aren't going so well
You have a big house, a perfect family, top job and skills in everything... on The Sims.
Signs that things aren't going so well
Not even auto-tune can fix your voice.
Signs that things aren't going so well
Your boyfriend calls and cancels because he's "washing his hair."
Definition
Highlighter (noun) - A marker used while studying which creates the illusion that you understand the material.
Signs that things aren't going so well
Your government decides pizza is a vegetable.
Tips for success
When having an "I love you more" argument with your significant other, tell them they're right. They'll appreciate your agreeable nature.
Definition
CLASS (acronym) - Come Late And Start Sleeping.
Definition
Multiple Choice (adjective) - Multiple Guess.
Tips for success
Knee socks can be used to hide unshaven legs.
Signs that things aren't going so well
Sarah Palin thinks you're an idiot.
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