Also By UsSlow RobotI Waste So Much TimeI Waste So Much MoneyDear Blank Please BlankAttack of the Cute
To do list
Find a girl named Stacy. Ask to meet her mother.
Definition
Happiness (noun) - Turning to the page you wanted on the first try.
Signs that things aren't going so well
Your doctor's "good" news is "You're going to have a disease named after you."
Fact
Without stupid people, no one would be smart.
Tips for success
To save time, always assume the sliding glass door is open when running.
Tips for success
If your laptop starts to overheat from working too hard, pour a refreshing glass of ice water on it to cool it down and give it a well deserved break.
Definition
Week before prom (noun) - When 82% of the girls in your school develop the skin tone of an Oompa Loompa.
Definition
Valentine's Day (noun) - A day specifically designed to make single people feel bad about themselves.
Tips for success
Save your breath, you are going to need it to inflate your valentine.
Definition
Paper clip (noun) - A staple for people with commitment issues.
Fact
Keys open doors, but bricks open windows.
Signs that things aren't going so well
Your neighborhood is mentioned in a rap song.
Definition
Childhood (noun) - When you didn't have to be drunk to make stupid decisions.
Definition
University (noun) - A place that pays your professors to misspell simple words in their Powerpoint presentations.
Tips for success
If allergic to a food, eat as much of it as possible to build up an immunity.
Realized
Your siblings are proof that your parents didn't learn their lesson.
Signs that things aren't going so well
Your Sim had it's first kiss before you did.
Tips for success
Eat KFC everyday, the hormones in the chicken will give you bigger boobs.
Tips for success
If you drop your popsicle on the floor, be sure to rinse it in hot water to kill any germs.
Tips for success
In golf, the best players score under par. You can apply this winning mentality to your own life by striving to be subpar.