Also By UsSlow RobotI Waste So Much TimeI Waste So Much MoneyDear Blank Please BlankAttack of the Cute
Definition
Acne (noun) - God's way of trying to keep teenagers celibate.
Definition
Paranoia (noun) - When you've been circling C's on your exam for the last five questions.
Definition
Zits (noun) - Your face speaking braille.
Realized
No matter how many pencils you buy at the beginning of the school year, you will always end up losing them before second semester.
Tips for success
Never knock on heavens door. Ring the doorbell and then run, he hates that.
Definition
Cigarette (noun) - A small cylindrical object with smoke at one end and a fool at the other.
Signs that things aren't going so well
Your girlfriend's roommate complains you guys were too loud last night. You were out of town.
Signs that things aren't going so well
You get matched with your mother on Chemistry.com.
Definition
Shirt sleeve (noun) - Place to wipe your snot when you're sick.
Signs that things aren't going so well
Clicking the "I'm Feeling Lucky" button on Google is your idea of a risk.
Definition
What could possibly go wrong? (phrase) - What you say right before something goes terribly wrong.
Definition
Hopeless romantic (adjective) - A nice way to say "desperate."
Tips for success
Start a company that sells hearing aids. Make the volume on your commercials super low.
Realized
If you think writing in the proper tense is difficult now, just wait until time travel was possible.
Tips for success
Open a pack of gum in class, become the most popular kid in school for a few seconds.
Fact
They call the candy "Fun Size" because "Smaller than Normal" sounds depressing.
Realized
ipod! upside down is still ipod!
Realized
It is easier to tell your deepest secrets to a complete stranger than it is to tell people you have known all your life.
Signs that things aren't going so well
Your girlfriend finally tells you that she loves you... It's April Fools Day.
Definition
Accio (noun) - The magical equivalence to the Force.