Also By UsSlow RobotI Waste So Much TimeI Waste So Much MoneyDear Blank Please BlankAttack of the Cute
Realized
Having sex on an elevator is wrong on so many levels.
Realized
A fat chance and a slim chance are the same thing.
Realized
Eating junk food after working out doesn't defeat the purpose, it justifies the cause.
Realized
I'm not the praised genius that my mom convinced me I was.
Realized
When you walk into a spider web you automatically learn karate.
Realized
There are two types of people in this world: those who categorize the population into two types, and those who don't.
Realized
Women can't park well because for the past 400 years, they have been told that 3 inches is actually 6.
Realized
Men wear clothes. Women wear outfits.
Realized
The people in the library don't appreciate porn sites as much as you do.
Realized
The word OK is a sideways person.
Realized
I could never tell a Casey Anthony joke. If I did, my mom would kill me!
Realized
The penguin is the only species that is not human that can successfully control a continent.
Realized
Eating junk food after working out doesn't defeat the purpose, it justifies the cause.
Realized
ipod! upside down is still ipod!
Realized
The male version of a cougar is a pedophile.
Realized
Math problems are the only place where someone can buy 60 watermelons and no one wonders why.
Realized
Shouldn't old people drive faster than everyone else since they have less time left to waste?
Realized
"You're one in a million" means that there are over 6,000 people just like you.
Realized
If you think writing in the proper tense is difficult now, just wait until time travel was possible.
Realized
The water never splashes on your face the way it does in face wash commercials.