Realized
Saying "Oh, you're one of those..." can make anyone instantly self-conscious.
Realized
Spongebob lives in Bikini Bottom. He is absorbent. Spongebob is a tampon.
Realized
Helen Keller was the perfect woman.
Realized
Violence is never the answer. Unless the question is, "What is never the answer?"
Realized
Being sleepy is like being drunk, everything seems funnier and nothing makes sense.
Realized
All books, no matter how long they are, what genre they are, or even what age group they are, are all made up of different combinations of just 26 letters.
Realized
No matter how hard you try to emphasize your sarcasm, someone will always take you seriously.
Realized
Anything unrelated to elephants is irrelephant.
Realized
Democracy is really great, unless the majority of the people are stupid.
Realized
Marriage isn't a word, it's a sentence.
Realized
Many people misunderstand Mexicans. We think they're favorite sport is soccer, but that's only when they're not competing in cross country.
Realized
Shouldn't old people drive faster than everyone else since they have less time left to waste?
Realized
I'd rather sit naked on an iceberg serenaded by Rebecca Black for the rest of my life than let anyone see the full history of things I've googled.
Realized
Opinions are like butts. Everyone has one and some are better than others.
Realized
England doesn't have a kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.
Realized
I've heard "I Will Always Love You" by Whitney Houston more in the last week on TV than I ever had before.
Realized
On a special occasion, girls with straight hair curl it and girls with curly hair straighten it.
Realized
New Zealand is Australia's Canada.
Realized
Have you ever seen an Asian Nascar driver? That's what I thought...
Realized
Rebecca Black is more famous than I will ever be.
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