Realized
It doesn't matter what temperature the air in the room is, it's still room temperature.
Realized
Mom says no cake for breakfast but then serves dense cake covered in liquid sugar, also known as pancakes.
Realized
Why the game is called "Monopoly."
Realized
Swedish Fish are manufactured in Canada.
Realized
The media has elongated Anthony Weiner's predicament.
Realized
People can stalk you on Facebook just as easily as you stalk them.
Realized
You know that counting sheep isn't working when you start imagining detailed back-stories for each of them.
Realized
The tooth fairy teaches children that they can sell their body parts for money.
Realized
We kill people who kill people because killing people is wrong.
Realized
If it is not within 30 feet, Dora can't see it.
Realized
The grass on the other side is probably AstroTurf.
Realized
Waldo's mom never filed a missing person report.
Realized
Gum is to school what cigarettes are to prison.
Realized
A spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down, unless that medicine is insulin.
Realized
Computers are just like air conditioners, they stop working when you open Windows.
Realized
At one point, you came out of your dad's penis.
Realized
Vegans would make terrible zombies. They would walk around saying, "GRAAAAINS."
Realized
Maybe we should've called them "IF you're skinny jeans..."
Realized
There are four stages in life: You believe in Santa Claus. You don't believe in Santa Claus. You are Santa Claus. You look like Santa Claus.
Realized
No matter how hard you try to emphasize your sarcasm, someone will always take you seriously.
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