Also By UsSlow RobotI Waste So Much TimeI Waste So Much MoneyDear Blank Please BlankAttack of the Cute
Realized
Your face is an oxy-moron. It's "pretty ugly."
Realized
I like getting stickers more in High School than in Elementary School.
Realized
Weathermen are the worst psychics ever.
Realized
If it really is "needless to say," why does everyone always feel the need to say it?
Realized
Moses would make the best lifeguard ever.
Realized
You seem to always hit the place where you have already been injured.
Realized
The best part of the movie always happens when you're in the bathroom.
Realized
Money can't buy happiness, but I'd rather cry in a Ferrari.
Realized
The "&" symbol looks like a man dragging his butt across the floor.
Realized
The nursery rhyme never says that Humpty Dumpty was an egg.
Realized
The leading cause of death is birth.
Realized
The trouble with life is there's no background music.
Realized
We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police.
Realized
What's more awkward than accidently making eye contact with someone while looking around the room? Doing it a second time.
Realized
When you're drunk, toilets and sinks are synonymous.
Realized
Voldemort is a lot like a teenage girl. He has a diary, a favourite ring and necklace, a tiara, a special cup, a pet he adores, and an obsession with a famous teenage boy.
Realized
Saying "awkward" in an awkward situation doesn't make it any less awkward.
Realized
Rain is God's way of giving hobos a shower.
Realized
You don't realize how much you use a body part until you have injured it.
Realized
There are braille letters on the drive-up ATM.