Realized
All of the Disney princesses have serious daddy issues.
Realized
"My printer broke" is the new "my dog ate my homework."
Realized
Cinderella is proof that a pair of shoes can change a girl's life.
Realized
Wednesdays in which there is no rainfall are dry hump days.
Realized
People in scary movies have obviously never watched a scary movie.
Realized
If you're going to walk on thin ice, you might as well dance.
Realized
When boyfriend fights a guy for hitting on his girlfriend, he's a gentleman. When girlfriend fights a girl for hitting on her boyfriend, she's a jealous wench.
Realized
The male version of a cougar is a pedophile.
Realized
Whoever coined the phrase "quiet as a mouse" clearly has never stepped on one.
Realized
Anything unrelated to elephants is irrelephant.
Realized
Angry Birds teaches people that if somebody steals from you, it's ok to kill them to take back what is yours.
Realized
None of my teachers ever gave an A for effort.
Realized
School is the only place where a trip to the restroom becomes your favorite activity.
Realized
When someone says, "This isn't up to par," they're complimenting your excellent work since in golf you try to score below par.
Realized
John Lennon was killed by a fan... where are Justin Bieber's true fans?
Realized
STD's (noun) - Cooties for grown-ups.
Realized
If a laugh is a smile having an orgasm, a chuckle is a smile faking it.
Realized
No matter how politically correct you try to be, you will always offend someone.
Realized
Imagination works at it's best in the shower.
Realized
If you have to ask a person if they are okay, they are probably not okay.
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