Signs that things aren't going so well
You have a strong desire to reread the Twilight series.
Signs that things aren't going so well
Your boss is eating the poison cupcakes intended for your annoying coworker.
Signs that things aren't going so well
You love cottage cheese... on women's thighs.
Signs that things aren't going so well
You slept with the professor and still failed the class.
Signs that things aren't going so well
Pizza gets to your house faster than the police.
Signs that things aren't going so well
You have never lost an arm wrestling match... on a first date.
Signs that things aren't going so well
When you try to tan at the beach people start throwing wet towels over you before pushing you into the ocean.
Signs that things aren't going so well
Your new medication is to help your antidepressants work better.
Signs that things aren't going so well
You wear sweatpants so often that you now consider a pair of jeans your "fancy pants."
Signs that things aren't going so well
You call yourself ugly for attention. People agree with you.
Signs that things aren't going so well
You go to a Halloween party dressed as a prostitute. Everybody keeps asking you why you didn't dress up.
Signs that things aren't going so well
No one emails you anymore, so you revert to checking your spam folder.
Signs that things aren't going so well
People call you sir, but they keep adding "please leave" afterwards.
Signs that things aren't going so well
Your boyfriend gets you a gift "just because." It's deodorant.
Signs that things aren't going so well
The slip of paper you just took out of your fortune cookie is blank.
Signs that things aren't going so well
You can name 200 pokemon, but not the current president.
Signs that things aren't going so well
You click on the 'Chat with Local Singles' ads.
Signs that things aren't going so well
A terrorist just told you, "You da bomb!"
Signs that things aren't going so well
The McDonald's near your neighborhood shut down when the bank foreclosed your house.
Signs that things aren't going so well
You catch your son looking at porn. You're in it.
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