Tips for success
Instead of reading your high school English books, listen to Taylor Swift's songs. She really knows her classic novels.
Tips for success
Go to Black Friday sale. Bring pepper spray.
Tips for success
To save time in the shower, wash only the top half of your body. Let gravity do the rest.
Tips for success
When someone says "I love you," and you don't feel the same way, respond with "I love U2."
Tips for success
Run to Canada. They'll be busy searching Mexico.
Tips for success
A watched pot never boils... Always leave the stove unattended after turning it on, in order to ensure that your food will actually cook.
Tips for success
Vote Sarah Palin for president in 2012. Everyone needs some laughs before the world ends.
Tips for success
To encourage your girlfriend to lose weight, hang pictures of supermodels all over your house. She will appreciate the inspiration.
Tips for success
Don't read the book, it'll spoil the movie.
Tips for success
When driving, keep in mind that STOP is an acronym for Slight Tap On Pedal.
Tips for success
When in a fight on Facebook and you don't have a comeback, correct their grammar.
Tips for success
Condoms are expensive. Purchasing rubber bands and sandwich bags will more than suffice. Plus it avoids the awkwardness of purchasing condoms at a grocery store.
Tips for success
When you see a friend crying, pretend not to care. This will teach them independance. They'll thank you later for being such a good friend.
Tips for success
Save the planet by starting a Twilight book recycling organization in your town!
Tips for success
Humming the Pink Panther Theme while stealing items will raise your sneaking ability by 85%.
Tips for success
Put a red sock in your fathers white laundry. Everybody needs a change now and then.
Tips for success
Never get married. 50% of them end in divorce, and the other 50% end in death.
Tips for success
Slapping your boss on the butt will loosen up the office atmosphere.
Tips for success
Ask your wife if it can really be considered "labor" if she's the one laying down the entire time. She will be impressed by your observational humor, and remember why it is that she loves you.
Tips for success
Stay pretty so you never have to fend for yourself.
EVERYTHING WITHIN A MILLION PIXEL RADIUS OF HERE, COPYRIGHT © GROUCHYRABBIT.COM - CONTACT US - FEEDBACK - TERMS AND PRIVACY