Also By UsSlow RobotI Waste So Much TimeI Waste So Much MoneyDear Blank Please BlankAttack of the Cute
Tips for success
Water constitutes 70% of body weight. Stop drinking water to lose weight.
Tips for success
When emotional, be sure to log on to Facebook and post all your feelings in detail. Your friends will appreciate your openness.
Tips for success
Don't do today, what you can put off until tomorrow.
Tips for success
Use a small child as a sled. It really doesn't matter if there is snow or not. Just find a hill.
Tips for success
Instead of a lemonade stand, set up a booth for free mammograms.
Tips for success
That friend with a bladder control issue? I bet a surprise party would really cheer them up a lot.
Tips for success
When riding in an elevator, be sure to push all the buttons. Your fellow riders will appreciate the fact that you thought of everyone.
Tips for success
Be bad. Only the good die young.
Tips for success
if a girl turns you down, apply more Axe.
Tips for success
When people block you on Twitter or Facebook, they're just playing hard to get.
Tips for success
Wear the most dirty and disgusting clothes that you own to scholarship interviews to make sure they see how much you need the money.
Tips for success
Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.
Tips for success
Girls are competitive about the size of their boobs. Stare at your favorite pair to show your support.
Tips for success
Give a man a fire, and warm him for a day. Light a man on fire, and warm him for the rest of his life.
Tips for success
When someone says "cats have nine lives," kill their cat. They will appreciate that you corrected their misunderstanding.
Tips for success
Don't be afraid to choke on donuts. The hole in the center is for ventilation.
Tips for success
Pineapples are considered to be a sign of hospitality in many cultures. To show your new neighbors how hospitable you are, throw a pineapple through their window.
Tips for success
Drop out of school. This way you can maximize your availability of hours while working at McDonald's.
Tips for success
As a parent, always ask who your teenage son or daughter is texting. They will appreciate your interest in their social life.
Tips for success
When the little white packet says "DO NOT EAT!" it only means the wrapper.