Also By UsSlow RobotI Waste So Much TimeI Waste So Much MoneyDear Blank Please BlankAttack of the Cute
Tips for success
When your girlfriend comes over late at night, offer her the second controller for Call of Duty.
Tips for success
Shout, "Release the hounds! " at the sight of Jehovah Witnesses at your front door.
Tips for success
If you have to get a blood transfusion make sure to get tiger's blood.
Tips for success
Never smile. It gives you wrinkles and is a sign of weakness.
Tips for success
Cough on your friends when you're sick. They will thank you when they get to call in sick for work.
Tips for success
When a 30 page paper is hanging over your head make sure to wait until the last day to start working on it.
Tips for success
Wear short-shorts. Girls like it when guys are confident.
Tips for success
Sing the Pink Panther theme song when stealing things. This raises your stealth ability by 50%.
Tips for success
Keep your friends close, and your attractive friends even closer.
Tips for success
To lose weight, first turn your head to the right, and the turn it to the left. Repeat this exercise every time you are offered something to eat.
Tips for success
Shoes are expensive. Don't buy your child a pair until their feet have stopped growing.
Tips for success
Always tell people when you dream about them. It will make them feel loved.
Tips for success
To freshen your breath, smoke mint cigarettes.
Tips for success
Regular naps prevent old age, especially if you take them while driving.
Tips for success
The quickest and easiest way to let a girl know you like her is to pull her hair. Be sure to yank it hard so she gets the message.
Tips for success
Major in English.
Tips for success
Girls are competitive about the size of their boobs. Stare at your favorite pair to show your support.
Tips for success
When on a date always be texting. It will make her think you're really important.
Tips for success
When choking, shove more food in your mouth to push the food that you're choking on down.
Tips for success
Poke holes in your parents' condoms so there is someone else to do the dishes.