Also By UsSlow RobotI Waste So Much TimeI Waste So Much MoneyDear Blank Please BlankAttack of the Cute
To do list
Eat my neighbor's baby. Tell him it was Godzilla.
To do list
Imagine a world with no hypothetical situations.
To do list
Find a deaf person. Have them take a video camera to a forest and cut down a tree.
To do list
Light cigarette. Cough and splutter in undignified manner. Relight cigarette at correct end.
To do list
Empty a bottle of vodka. Fill the bottle with water. Bring it to school and drink in class. Watch the teacher's jaw drop.
To do list
Attach a sign to a manhole that reads, "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle tryouts. Inquire within."
To do list
Stand in an elevator. Every time someone walks in scream that they stepped on my invisible friend.
To do list
Go to see Contagion. In the middle of the movie start coughing loudly.
To do list
Get fat over the holidays. Make New Year's resolution to get thin. Wait a year. Repeat.
To do list
Steal candy from a baby. See how easy it really is.
To do list
Get Facebook account. Mourn my loss of social life.
To do list
Go to doctor's office. Bring apple.
To do list
Follow joggers around in a car blasting "Eye of the Tiger" for encouragement.
To do list
Hide three notes in three rooms for your partner saying "WILL", "YOU" and "ME." Pursue leisure activities while he or she looks for the final note.
To do list
Find a wrong way to eat a Reese's.
To do list
Move to Korea. Work at nail salon. Make Korean people feel like you're talking about them in English.
To do list
Buy lots of interesting books that I'm dying to read. Spend all my free time browsing pointless websites instead.
To do list
Change name to Curiosity. Kill cats.
To do list
Allow hands to become idle. Engage in the work of the Devil.
To do list
Audition for American Idol. Start singing one song, then switch in the middle to "Never Gonna Give You Up." Rickroll America.