Also By UsSlow RobotI Waste So Much TimeI Waste So Much MoneyDear Blank Please BlankAttack of the Cute
To do list
Get an F- in Algebra. Convince parents that two negatives equal a positive.
To do list
Name kids Control, Alt, Delete. Hit them all at once.
To do list
Find someone who thinks people are basically good, kill them.
To do list
Open up a pint of Ben & Jerry's. Throw away the lid.
To do list
Empty a bottle of vodka. Fill the bottle with water. Bring it to school and drink in class. Watch the teacher's jaw drop.
To do list
Go to the mall. Find a couple making out. Sit next to them and cry.
To do list
Paint with all the colours of the wind.
To do list
Find a burger that actually looks like the one in the commercial.
To do list
Make sign that says, "Honk if you hate car horns."
To do list
Become a teacher. Dress up as Gandalf. Tell students, "you shall not pass!"
To do list
Find out whose cruel idea it was to put an "s" in the word "lisp." Give them a high-five.
To do list
Put peeled onions on a stick, dip in chocolate. Hand out to children trick or treating.
To do list
Stand in the middle of a large crowd of people. Point somewhere and yell, "Holy crap! Is that little girl naked?" Shun the ones who turn to look.
To do list
Get a windshield that is made from my eyeglass prescription. Watch people who get in my car freak out because they can't see anything.
To do list
Learn how to say "Thank you for the pedicure!" in Korean.
To do list
Put an elephant in the room.
To do list
Buy a turtle. Name it "The Speed of Light." Tell everyone that I can run faster than "The Speed of Light."
To do list
Separate dog food from Lucky Charms.
To do list
Close browser window. Get a life.
To do list
Buy an elephant. Put in room.