To do list
Get dog. Name her Payback.
To do list
Leave a box in the corner of an elevator, when someone gets on, ask them if they hear a ticking noise.
To do list
Buy treadmill. Hang coat on it.
To do list
Change name to Destiny. Have a child.
To do list
Get Facebook account. Mourn my loss of social life.
To do list
Stand in back of crowded elevator. Meow occasionally.
To do list
Fill cup with water. Hold over head. Breathe under water forever.
To do list
Go trick-or-treating on April fools day.
To do list
Write in to "How It's Made" demanding to see an episode on babies.
To do list
Buy a white windowless van. Pretend to have candy.
To do list
Find fat lady. Ask her to sing.
To do list
Go to another country for college. Take English. Feel extremely smart.
To do list
Find a tree where elves make cookies. Rob it.
To do list
Dump a bag of Skittles in the toilet. Flush. Watch a three second NASCAR race.
To do list
Spray a mosquito with mosquito repellent. Laugh because he will never have any friends.
To do list
Fill hands with water. Make sneeze noise behind a stranger and throw water at their back. Comment on how much mucus was in your nose.
To do list
Invent bubble wrap that repairs itself for later popping.
To do list
Become a bomb technician. Sprint out of building after defusing a bomb. Watch as panic ensues.
To do list
Attend Bruno Mars Concert. Bring grenade.
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