To do list
Go to grocery store. Ask cashier if they are checking me out.
To do list
Change your name in your Grandma's phone to "Death." Call her repeatedly.
To do list
Kill Black. Frame Bieber.
To do list
Get dog. Name her Payback.
To do list
Go into a restaurant with a sign that says "Breakfast anytime" and order french toast during the Renaissance period.
To do list
Buy angry birds stuffed animals. Walk around town throwing them at people.
To do list
Empty a bottle of vodka. Fill the bottle with water. Bring it to school and drink in class. Watch the teacher's jaw drop.
To do list
Walk to fridge. Return to seat disappointed. Repeat.
To do list
Go to the Container Store. Ask where you can find something to contain a body.
To do list
Allow hands to become idle. Engage in the work of the Devil.
To do list
Hide money in pocket of winter coat. Forget money is there. Get excited when you find the money there come winter time.
To do list
Mope about not having a boyfriend. Install a detachable shower head.
To do list
Walk through a large crowd. Ask someone every so often if they've seen Waldo.
To do list
Get a GPS. Enter "P. Sherman 42 Wallaby Way Sydney." Find the person who stole Nemo.
To do list
Find a bruised apple on the shelf. Give it a soft hug and whisper, "Who did this to you?"
To do list
Steal someone's diary. Write, "Hello, my name is Tom Riddle" in it.
To do list
Mash up Oreos. Pour into flower pot. Eat in public.
To do list
Become an old man. Wear Speedo. Go to beach.
To do list
Become a bomb technician. Sprint out of building after defusing a bomb. Watch as panic ensues.
To do list
Use a Shake Weight while wearing a Snuggie and Pajama Jeans. Mourn the loss of my dignity.